chikaidestroyer | ∞ 88: Three years displaced [written/action]

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∞ 88: Three years displaced [written/action]

[written]

Professor Sage is missing -- has been missing since before the Halloween ball. Please keep an eye out for her, and others who went missing during the previous experiment, along with any possible New Feathers who may show up this month.

As a reminder, we have now entered the fourth cycle year as of October 26. Be sure to pick up a new calendar in the welcoming center or library.

Thank you.

[action]

[The sun is out, the effects are gone, and people are returning to their normal states. Despite all of that, Albert still finds himself somehow unsteady. Perhaps it has something to do with Rune being unable to find any of his brood. Perhaps it has something to do with the continued lack of presence from Epona's master. Perhaps...

He can be found between his house and community building 7, in the stables and corral he rebuilt with Link. Today he finds himself spending more time with Astrid and Epona, as if that will somehow make up for the fact that they had been left to fend for themselves in the fog. He even has his saddle if he feels like riding. ~~His~~ A tiny owl perches on a nearby fence post, outside for the first time in almost two weeks.

Like so many others, Albert is more than ready to put aside the stress caused by a handful of scientists. So instead, he reminisces over his three years in Luceti.]

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You don't? Then why are you trying to make me leave? [He's not an idiot - he knows he's trying to annoy him on purpose. But there's a certain hesitance about Caesar, too. He wants him to talk to him, but...]

[Of course Caesar would catch on. Of course. He was an idiot, but still analytical enough to notice something like that.] Because I need to think. [While it was true, it was also terribly vague.]

[Caesar was ready to say that if he wanted him to leave, all he had to do was say so, but he stops himself. He knows Albert would take that as an invitation, especially when he was like this.]

Then let's talk about it. It might help.

[This is not the expression of someone who wants to talk about it.]

[Aww, come on.]

Why not? If there's one person here that you can trust, it's me. [Maybe that was an understatement. There was the trust they put in the villagers, sure, but this was an entirely different kind of trust.]

Here? [Well, at least he sounds exasperated instead of annoyed.]

Anywhere. [Caesar couldn't be sure if there were people Albert trusted more than him, so he couldn't be presumptuous. But he'd trusted him with other things, so this shouldn't be any different.] I'd tell you anything. Besides, I don't have anyone else to tell your secrets to. Remember?

You do, but you wouldn't be bothered enough to do so. [Caesar had his acquaintances. He even had the owl if he was desperate enough for company.

...]

I have been thinking about my time in Luceti. That's all.

Your secrets aren't worth sharing with anyone else. [But the truth was that he just didn't trust anyone like he trusted his brother. It only took an entire year for him to be okay with that again.

He tilts his head at that. That was still terribly vague.] What's to think about?

[His lips twitch into a frown as he decides to explain. He keeps his tone neutral.] You know as well as I how much happens in a year. How much one is personally affected.

It shouldn't be a surprise to hear one would not be pleased by how they have been affected over the years.

[Caesar listens carefully. It is perhaps the most attentive he's been with anyone since the end of that experiment. He nods.]

Affected how? [If Albert was displeased by something, it wouldn't be right to just... guess at what it was.]

[Okay, beating around the bush wasn't doing anything for his mood.] Affected. By the situation, the experiments, the people. I would not have scars in our world, Caesar, or the constant threat of memory and ability taken away by a wayward Shift.

Every time a year passes, I am reminded of how being in this world is changing me.

I know that. [It was one of the biggest reasons that seeing Albert hurt bothered him - because he knew it wouldn't have happened back home.

Caesar considers this for a moment. What could he say? There was nothing that'd make it better. All he could do was be honest.

...but he didn't really want to. Because he didn't like thinking about this in the first place.]

I don't like it, either. It hasn't all been bad, but... [Ugh. He didn't have the words.] If something is wrong, you fix it. You may not be able to avoid everything this place does to you, but you're still you. You still have some control, don't you?

You realize by now that I do control as much as I can, don't you? Even then, there are the experiments, the-- mushi. [That particular event still garnered a negative reaction from him. How out of control had he been while he was recovering? How panicked and stressed had he been by his own thoughts?]

Something will always come up. We face the same threat of mental degradation that past cycles went through under all of these Shifts. [And yet he had said he would not leave if given the chance. He just needed to vent right now.]

[It was the first time he'd even mentioned the mushi thing to him since it happened. The reaction doesn't surprise him, and yet the apparent disgust in Albert's voice is still enough to strike Caesar.]

Who says we'll even be here that long? [He sighs a little. It was okay to let Albert vent - he never talked about these things. But Caesar didn't like just hearing him talk like that.] Maybe you've changed, but there are some things that won't ever change.

...It's early to worry, true. [But how many had he seen leave? How many had returned without any memory of their last time in Luceti? Caesar was just one of many.]

Far too early. [Normally, when it came to these things, he wouldn't even try, but he had to say something. He had convinced Albert to speak up in the first place, after all.] I don't mean that you shouldn't worry or that you should just accept those changes, but will it really help to think of them like this?

I suppose it's even more stressful than thinking about the hallucinations from last week. [He's sounding fairly reasonable about all of this.]

I'd imagine so! Those were just some stupid visions, anyway. Haven't worse things actually happened to you?

[P-perhaps not very comforting but, um. It's true.]

Of course. But being so vividly reminded of them isn't appreciated.

I know. [Of course, he didn't actually know - he didn't even want to imagine the things that Albert had seen.] But it's over now, so you have no reason to think of them like this.

Shall I not think about it because it occurred in the past?

N-no, that's not it. [He frowns, shaking his head a little.] I just think that... maybe you should focus on the good things that have happened. The positive things. Your accomplishments. You must have done something here in all that time that you can be proud of, right?

...Do you see anything in this village worth being proud of, Caesar?

There must be something. [...hmm, does he really want to say it?] I can think of at least one thing for me.